One Foot On The Platform, One Foot On The Train

 

Don't be like this guy

 

So about three months ago I moved in with my girlfriend. We live in a share house in Newtown with three others. “Who cares?” I hear you thinking or possibly saying out loud as you munch loudly on your delicious honey glazed cashews. Well, that is a good question but not one I care to answer. But I digress… I wanted to share this with you all because I think some of what I’ve learnt may enrich your lives & possibly even help you if you’re ever in a similar situation.

A lot of us have trouble making decisions. “Should I, or shouldn’t I?”, “Scotch or Beer?”, “Burger or wrap?”. In my case it was “Move in with GF or not?”. In relationships, I am always reminded of some advice a wise friend once told me, he said “At 6 months, evaluate. At 1 year, move in together. At 2 years, you’ve been living together for a year, it’s time to shit or get off the pot.” Ie. if you can stand living together for a year, you’re ready for marriage & conversely if you have had a rough time during that year, it’s probably time to move on & stop wasting each others time.

While I may not agree with the timeline 100% I do find it hard to fault the logic of the whole thing. If you’re going to do something, do it with all your heart or not at all. Sarah & I had been together for ~1.5 years when we moved in. It’s been about 3 months & it’s going great so far. While I don’t intend on getting married anytime too soon, I do enjoy living with this woman.

I’m trying to make a couple of points here. For the sake of brevity, let me spell them out:

1) If you’re umming & aahing about whether or not to move in with someone you have been seeing for > 1 year. Either take the plunge or pull the plug (sorry for mixed metaphor). Take your left foot off the platform and join your right on the train with your lovely partner. It will either be a nice trip together or you can get off at the next station & say goodbye. If instead you decide that this trip is not for you because it’s not that kinda relationship or myriad possible other reasons, join your left foot on the platform & wave goodbye. Atleast you can stop wasting each others time. (disclaimer: I know there are those of us who are in a mutually casual relationship & that’s a whole other barrel of cheesels. Btw if this is you, you sicken me… Kidding)

2) If you’re going to do ANYTHING in life. Do it with all your heart. Both feet on the train. I’m a musician, it’s what I do & I give it all I got. If I was an accountant, I would want to be giving that all I got too. I think you get my point.

(No, the point is not – Nobody wants to be an accountant. Although that may be somewhat true [sorry accountant friends, you can back-hand me with your overflowing wallets when next we meet])

If you’d like to see Sarah’s view on things you can check out her blog: http://musiciansgirl.wordpress.com (which needs some serious lovin’) or follow her on Twitter: http://twitter.com/itsmefrarah

Hope you enjoy the shit out of your day.

– Ryan

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